Absolution Project my betrayal

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My reflection tells a story of how things have gone wrong
But my memories have told me all along
When I see what I want, I take what I want
but everyday there's so much to consume
But It's finally more than
It's more than I can abuse
I can abuse
Self medication is my own excuse
In desperation for this life I choose
Has the purpose of my life been wrong
Am I really all these things I've done
Once again I'm becoming a victim of me
This veil won't hide what I don't want you to see
My own betrayal
although it all seems irrelevant to me
I should be able
to make myself see
all these things I can't make myself believe
A deep self loathing as the days pass by
Increased postponing that I can't deny
I've estranged my spirit from my body and soul
In anticipation of what awaits below
My own betrayal
although it all seems irrelevant to me
I should be able
to make myself be
who I want me to be
Who do I want to be
There's not much left of me

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