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Twin: Hi, is this, uh, Baba Brinkman?
Baba: Yeah, whoâs this?
Twin: Baba Brinkman the ârapping evolutionistâ
Baba: Yeah
Twin: Iâm not sure how to tell you this
Itâs a bit awkward, but, um, Iâm your identical twin
Baba: No shit?
Twin: Yeah, I tracked you down with a Google search,
Iâve known for about two years, but I thought
No, itâs just too weird
Baba: What?!? No way, whatâs your birthday?
Twin: Itâs October 22nd 1978
The same as yours, I tracked you through an adoption agent
Iâve been watching you since about 2008
I canât say why our biological parents would want to separate us
But anyway, I thought we should, you know, get acquainted
Baba: Iâm sorry, I just donât know what to say
Iâm shocked, I canât wait to talk to my mom
And dad and ask them what the hell they were on
Giving up an identical twin for adoption
But I guess they probably had their reasons
Twin: So I guess that means
Youâre a pretty easy-going guy, âcause I thought you might
You know, be angry, or maybe even cry
Baba: Well, maybe when I see you I might need to dry
An eye but for now Iâm just completely surprised
And curious as hell, I mean, whatâs the deal?
What do you do, do you have kids, do you take care of yourself?
Are you married? I mean, this is very surreal
Have you ever read about âtwin studiesâ?
Itâs, like, the only way we can tell
Which elements of the personalities we develop
Can be called the result of the environmental field
Compared to the part thatâs beem genetically built
Twin: Yeah, Iâm not so into science, but my job is
That I teach creative writing at a community college
And yeah, I have a little girl, and a beautiful wife
Weâve been married since 2005
Baba: Creative writing?
When you were a kid did your adopted parents
Read to you at night
Twin: No, they werenât really âbook peopleâ, why?
Baba: Oh, itâs just that my dad always likes to take credit
For my success as a rapper, âcause he read to me as an infant
But I always wondered whether my language instincts were genetic
And this is evidence
Twin: I really pictured this
Reunion as having a bit more emotional resonance
Baba: Yeah, well, youâre not exactly pouring on the expressiveness
Yourself
Twin: I know, Iâve never seen the necessity
My wife tells me itâs an âemotional repressionâ thing
But Iâm not unaffectionate, it just seems excessive to me
Baba: Yeah, that could be a description of me
Twin: Okay, if weâre questioning
What about you, wife, girlfriend?
Baba: No, Iâm not really a relationship type of person
I mean, itâs not like an aversion, itâs just that Iâm always on tour and
Itâs tough to imagine how to even try to work it in
Twin: But rapping, you must get some attention from women
Baba: Attention, sure, but Iâm not indiscriminate
I mostly tour colleges campuses, you can picture it
In town for one night, most women just arenât into it
I mean, thereâs been an occasional grad student incident
Twin: My wife is a grad student
Baba: Yeah, well, Iâm envious
I wish I could have that kind of connection, intimate
My lifestyle could hardly be more itinerant
Twin: You came to my college, in 2006, you rapped
The Canterbury Tales for the medieval English class
Baba: What? Why didnât you contact me?
Twin: Because I didnât know
I only tracked you two years ago, remember?
Plus I was on sabbatical, me and my wife, we had this wholeâ¦
That time was stressful
Baba: Oh, sorry bro
Twin: Look, itâs not your fault, itâs just that
I turned into this guy, this safe provider type
And I panicked, and I left my wife, and I moved to the other side
Of the planet, to Europe, but it just didnât fit me
I was just an anonymous writer in a big city
And I wasnât confident with women so I lasted six weeks
Baba: And your wife took you back, huh?
Twin: Yup, I guess thatâs love
And then nine months later along came little Rebecca
Baba: Nine months later?
Twin: Yeah, give or take
Itâs funny how our lives have developed in different ways
I mean, I envy your lifestyle â it looks pretty flat-out
I decided to contact you when I saw you on Rachel Maddow
Baba: Yeah, sheâs fantastic⦠so you and your wife
Youâve been happy since your little European crisis?
Twin: Yeah, sheâs a good mother, Iâm lucky to have her
Baba: And youâre never tempted to, you know, stray from the pasture?
Hook up with one of your students maybe, I donât know
Do something crazy?
Twin: Yeah, Iâm tempted, occasionally
But itâs a two-way street, right? I mean, basically
How can I trust her if she canât trust me?
Baba: And you trust her?
Twin: Yes, now, but Iâve had some jealous times
I mean, when Rebecca was like two and half
I took her to the clinic and I got a check-up and I
Asked the doctor to give her a paternity test on the side
Baba: Really, why? Does she have like an âethnic vibeâ?
Twin: No, she looks like me, sheâs freckled and white
She was just born a bit quickly after that difficult time
And I didnât wanna be suspicious, but Iâ¦
Baba: And the verdict?
Twin: The doctor said sheâs definitely mine
One hundred percent DNA test certified
Baba: Oh, thatâs great then, Iâd love to meet your kid
Twin: And my wifeâ¦
Baba: Yeah, I was gonna say that next
Okay, look, I have to go, thereâs this thing for the Fringe
Iâm writing this play aboutâ¦
Twin: Yeah, Human Nature, yes
Iâve been tracking you through your Facebook friends
Iâll be interested to hear what you have to say about twins
Baba: Yeah, well, as soon as I can, Iâll come visit you
Twin: Okay, Baba, just call me when youâre ready to
- Album:
- Big Boy In Love
- The Canterbury Tales Remixed
- The Rap Guide to Evolution: Revised
- The Rap Guide to Business - EP
- The Rap Guide to Human Nature
- Rapconteur
- Apocalyptic Utopian Dreams In the Western Wilderness
- The Rap Guide to Evolution
- The Rap Canterbury Tales
- Lit Hop
- Swordplay
- The Rap Guide to Religion
- The Rap Guide to Medicine