Lois: it seems today that all you see is violence in movies and sex on T.V.
Peter: But where all those good 'ol fashioned values on which we use to rely?
Brian: it use to be a big time star, was elegent as Garbo, or Hedy Lamarr
Stewie: But now we get whores like Jenny Lopez, you want to curl up and die
Lucky there's a Family Guy. Lucky there's a man who positively can do all the things that make us-
Stewie: Laugh and cry
He's a Family Guy
Louis: When I was young, the songs were fair, with Mister Johnny Mathis, and Sonny and Cher
Peter: But now we get Justin Timber-homo
Louis: A heartache all gone awry!
Brian: The classic films were works of art, the images were graceful, the stories were smart
Stewie: But now we get Matrix Revolution, I'm sorry I know this doesn't rhyme, but what the hell were you Wachowski Brothers
thinking?!
Lucky there's a family guy, lucky there's a fella, sweeter than vanilla, wholesome as a piece of-
Stewie: Apple Pie
He's a family guy
Lois: His smile's a simple delight
Chris: He lets me see the boobies on the internet sites
Lois: Peter!
Meg: He bought me my cute little hat.
Brian: Yeah we should have a talk about that.
About that! And his hat!
Brian: He's mastered the comedy arts
Stewie: He says, Look out, Hiroshima! then casually farts
Lois: He's loaded with sexy appeal.
Peter: And best of all my titties are real, Have a feel!
Brian: No thank you
Stewie: I gave it the office
Lois: The Brady Bunch has got their Mike and pretty Laura Petrie has dicky Van Dyke. But who around here could fill those
loafers?
But here's a happy reply. Lucky there's a family guy. Lucky there's a man who positively can do all the thing that
make us-
Stewie: Laugh and Cry!
He's a Family Guy! He's a Family Guy!!!

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