Kids, I don't know what's wrong with these kids today
Kids, who can understand anything they say?
Kids, they are disobedient, disrespectful oafs
Noisy, crazy, sloppy, lazy, loafers
And while we're on the subject
Kids, you can talk and talk till your face is blue
Kids, but they still do just what they want to do
Why can't they be like we were, perfect in every way?
What's the matter with kids today?
Kids, I don't mind the moonlight swims
If I [Incomprehensible] the [Incomprehensible] that hurts
Kids, how we ever beat the Russians
Kids, I didn't know what puberty was, it was almost past it
Laughing, singing, dancing, grinning, morons
And while we're on the subject
Kids, they are just impossible to control
Kids, with their awful clothes and their rock an' roll
Why can't they dance like we did
What's wrong with Sammy Caine?
What's the matter with kids today?

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