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One tequila two tequila three tequila floor
Well it's quiet tonight
Nothing much to do
The weather is cold
And the women too
So I head down the local
Til the evening's through
Gotta get me some of that
Old home brew
Well there's nothin' sweeter
Than barley foam
Gonna get so drunk
They'll carry me home
I'm hitting the bottle
As hard as I can
Cos the last one standing
Is the saddest man
The telly is on
And the footie is fair
But I'm so hammered
That I just don't care
When the weight of the world
Is too much to bear
Hey a half a dozen pints
And it's all thin air
Chorus
God bless the people
Who invented wine
And the man who thought of beer
Well he was damn, damn fine
I'll party with the waitress
Til she says last call -
...
he's so damn pretty
Whoo - yeah!
Now the morning after
A terrible night
Well I'm so hungover
I can't stand the light
But I don't regret
Getting ultra-tight
A little hair of the dog
And I'll feel all right
Chorus (2x)