I should have felt the distress in your fall, this denial, your refusal of the life that bound us together out of spite.
I understand, feel the addiction that is dragging you to the bottom, it runs through me, draws towards me.
Without the voice, the dialogue is more audible and only your hand remains, its writings which will ultimately replace your cries.
A smell of flesh competes with perfume, takes possession of the air .
Violently sucked into this gaping hole, he looks at me, listless, and says "now or never".
All these words that we were never able to say were exchanged in silence by the glances of our two cracked beings.
Sweet moment, sweet mother...
Without weakening, the animadversion fueled this furious desire to finally contemplate a common spectacle.
Many times, I writes an implacable scenario.
Every evening the habit of misfortune was adjusted, unspeakable.
Time, its work, leaves of these dark hours only flashes of this frightening hell which broke us all .
Floods of corrosive ethanol burned your choices, this is what I have left of you, a slow warm light from a cold sun, these rare deep moments of communion veiling the inevitable destruction.
For a long time all that remained of the darkness was an impatient desire to leave, to grow up, abandon the den soaked in smoke, bathed in alcohol, break the chains of the past, create the unreal.
My visceral ideal lost in the abyss of absolute darkness these sweet dissonant chords of melancholy, strident, exhume my corpse of boredom.
Naked before the world, asphyxia seems natural, arterial.
The ages can running, experience nourishing, resentments rotting, atonal textures and time giving a chance to heal.
The insect that swarms, munching on cells, fattened by abuse, threatening with a thousand somations, will devour you .
Imprisoned in your throat, the hungry beast closed.
Here you are now among ours, my caring mother, appeased alongside those who build us.
Those who build us grow. have learned to dominate this sinister atavistic madness which embraces you and me.
We will only have been able to get to know each other at the end, these last silent hours before departure, full of delicate smiles, of attention, these breaths of understanding have forever engraved my memory.
I was only able to taste so little of all that, it's so hard, I miss it.

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