I was widowed from the love of my life
disconnected my umbilical, bills and time
melted that candle, behind my mask, my eyes
till the wick was gone and wax had dried
but I woke again
it’s fucked, it took the death of a friend
now he keeps me burning, a slow denial of what’s given
I want to sit at his grave, say, “we’ve got plans!”
we’ll all burn forever or till we can see him again
a seam between the lost and the beautiful
he was American muscle, my god, my friend
my kid brother, not someone I met
we’ll all bloom forever, no sleep, no rest
we sat and drank coffee
some of us smoked pall malls
told stories of his youth and brilliance

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