When you've tried everything
but crustaceans as castanets
will there be anything left
but to drink yourself to death
When are they going to make a machine
that will write the songs for you?
You've tried everything
to be the king of anachronistic pop
and you're no nearer to the top
do you think it's time to stop?
When are you going to write the song
that will make them all love you?
At the album playback everyone talked all over your masterpiece
ate the canapes, the fluffy crab cakes
the inspiration for crustaceans as castanets
Well you've tried....
You've tried....
You've tried...
Why do you bother going on tour
When there's a band that sounds like you in every town?
Do it for the canapes, the fluffy crab cakes
the inspiration for crustaceans as castanets
Now you've tried everything....

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