Satanic Surfers hank armless skater

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I have a friend whose only joy in life
Is to skate, surf and masturbate
That's all he wants to do
And I think that's really great
But one day he had an accident
They had to amputate his arms
Guess if he was sad that day
He can't surf, he can't skate
And he sure can't masturbate no more

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