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Hi, my name is Stuart
Would you be my friend?
Then we could be best pals
Until the bitter end
Would you protect me from those guys that kick my ass?
Every other day in front of my 8: 30 class
Hi, my name is Stuart
Would you be my pal?
Maybe I could up
With a special gal
And we could make out in the back seat of my car
If I played my cards right, we could go real far
Then I'd have a friend now
'Cause now I have none
We could hang out in the museum
It would be so much fun
Would you hang with me? We could drink a beer!
But we'd have to drink it fast 'cause my parents are here...
Hi, our names our Stuart
We are your comrads
We shall band together
So we can kick some ass
Nerds of America, we must unite!
And together we will win this fight!