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I have a few confessions to make
She said Iâm a coldhearted venomous snake
She said Iâm a liar, she said Iâm a bore
I talk smack about all my friends when they walk out the door
She said Iâm socially awkward, a religious fraud
I will judge you if you donât believe in my God,
I wear sequins and chains with a dose of bad taste
I will stab you in the back while smiling to your face
I learned some interesting things about myself today
Through text message and Facebook posts
And things that people say
Iâm snobby, cranky, awkward, rude,
And my singing voice is the worst
If I keep being insulted,
Iâll just write another verse
She said I write mean songs
About people who hurt me
I have lots of dogs and cats
And my house is always dirty
I think Iâm a rockstar
I love the lights and smoke
My college education is
Nothing but a joke
Iâm a psychotic gothic freak
Who likes weird music too
Iâm a total snob in my thrift store dress
And my clearance Payless shoes
I am bossy, controlling, relentless, and naughty
I am dangerous and stubborn and something like Dottie
I learned some interesting things about myself today
Through text message and Facebook posts
And things that people say
Iâm snobby, cranky, awkward, rude,
And my singing voice is the worst
If I keep being insulted,
Iâll just write another verse
Darling donât you know thereâs no such thing
As bad publicity
Youâre only making me more popular
By slinging mud at me