I like convertible cars
And VCR’s
Smoking cigarrettes
At the dinner table
Ill open the door for you
Cause you’re a lady
I wanna ask your hand in marriage
Then go and join the navy
I eat monsanto
Everyday i go to work
To buy blue jeans and v necks
Don’t ask why i like Star Trek
My toilet is filthy
I have a pizza under my loveseat
I drive a white Chevy Malibu
I have a black belt in Kung Fu
Un modern man
Your mother would love me
I don’t have a cellular phone
But i can cook you a TV dinner
Un modern man
I can teach you a second language
I got a mail-order bride in bed
I rent videos
Fuck the internet
My favourite concert was
Metallica and Guns and Roses
At the olympic stadium
Faith No More opened
James burnt his face off
In a pyro accident
And when the Guns ended short
The city went to shit
I drive a school bus
And like to bully kids
On Saturday nights
Im playing pinball
Or maybe you can find me at the baseball diamond
I like to make my wife wash my car in a bikini
Un modern man
Your mother would love me
I don’t have a cellular phone
But i can cook you a TV dinner
Un modern man
I can teach you a second language
I got a mail-order bride in bed
I rent videos
Fuck the internet

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