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Cledus T. Judd
Miscellaneous
If Shania Was Mine (Parody Any
Man
Of
Mine - Shania Twain)
(Chris Clark/Cledus T. Judd/Robert Lange/Shania Twain)
If Shania was mine, wouldn't be proud of me,
Couldn't hardly blame her 'cos I'm so durned ugly.
But on our first date, we could have a good time,
If I got her on the moonshine.
If Shania was mine, say it fit just right,
Though the polyester suit was just a little too tight.
And there's no way I'd have a bad hair day,
'Cos I'd buy a new toupee.
Oh. I'd love to seduce her,
But she married her producer.
Now all I do is pray, pray, pray,
She'll get a gay boy some day.
If Shania was mine, I'd prob'ly lose my mind,
If she only squeezed me, teased me, pleased me one little time.
And if she only knew, all the things I'd do.
I'd be the lawn mowing, crop-growing,
'Tato peeling, house cleaning kind.
If Shania was mine.
Well, If Shania was mine, she'd have to agree,
Can't no-one cook brocceel better than me.
And a dozen mountain oysters and some old fatback,
She's says: Mmmmm.
I
like
it
like
that!
Now all I do is wonder,
Whose bed her boots have been under.
I wish it had've been mine, now, whine, whine,
That girl's so doggone fine.
If Shania was mine, I think I'd go slap blind,
Starin' at her yummy little tummy and her booty shakin' round behind.
And if she only knew, all the things I'd do.
I'd be the lawn mowing, crop-growing,
'Tato peeling, house cleaning kind.
If Shania.
If Shania.
If Shania.
Now was that mud lime, or deep white, yokel?
When she shimmies, and shakes, it's more than I can take.
Oh, what she does to me in them videos,.
Wife's gonna leave me if I don't explain, what I see in Shania Twain.
I'd love to see her in a magzine, centrefold if you know what I mean.
Oh, me a', oh, my a', I was Shania would buy me a house in South Carolina.
Two, four, six, eight, nine, I wish that Shania was mine.
- Álbum:
- Parodyziac!!
- Polyrically Uncorrect
- Six Pack of Judd
- Cledus Envy
- Cledus Navidad
- Just Another Day In Parodies
- Juddmental
- Did I Shave My Back For This?
- I Stoled This Record
- (No Relation)
- Cledus T. Judd (No Relation)
- Miscellaneous
- Bipolar and Proud
- Non-Album Releases
- The Essenshul Cledus T. Judd
- Essenshul Cledus T. Judd
- Cledus T. Judd And Friends
- Cledus.T.Judd
- Promo Only: Country Radio, December 2004
- Promo Only: Country Radio, May 2005