December 25th, 1986, Van Nuys, Merry Christmas
Well, that's what people say at Christmas, right?
Except for normally they have somebody to say it to
They have their friends and family
They have a big crouch naked beneath the Christmas tree
With a needle in their arm
Like an insane person in a mansion in Van Nuys
They're not out of their minds
They're not writing in a diary
And they're definitely not watching
Their holiday spirit coagulate in a spoon
I didn't speak to a single person today
I thought why should I ruin their fucking Christmas?
I've started a new diary
And this time I have a few new reasons
One, I have no friends left
Two, so I can read back and remember
What I did the day before
And three so if I die
At least I leave a nice little suicide note of my life
It's just me and you, diary, welcome to my fucking life
Nobody would believe
The shit that happens inside my head, it's haunted
Now I've come down from the drugs
And it seems like a sick play
That I saw on the theater somewhere thirty minutes ago
I could've killed somebody or better yet myself

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