The Ouse Valley Singles Club girl from the fens

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I love a girl
And that is that
She comes from the East
Where the land is flat
And on the surface
She may seem dumb
'Cause her cousin is her uncle
And he's married to her mum
But she's alright she's my Fenland Rose
She's got two strong arms
And she's got webbed toes
And when we get close and she gets randy
Her extra finger comes in quite handy
She's my girl from the Fens
She's my girl from the Fens
She's my girl from the Fens
She's my girl from the Fens
If you meet a girl who comes from Wisbech
You might have trouble understanding her speech
Oh she sounds just like the Tasmanian Devil
And she gets a nosebleed above sea level
On our first date, we got a bit tipsy
She took me to a place
Where a farmer shot a gypsy
And then we went to King's Lynn
To do some shopping
She's the Cambridgeshire champion of carrot-topping
She's my girl from the Fens
She's my girl from the Fens
She's my girl from the Fens
She's my girl from the Fens
Well my Fenland girl has got the X-factor
At 6 years old she learned to drive a tractor
And at 8 she plucked turkeys, 9 she kept quails
She was born with the black soil under her nails
From Peterborough where they're a bit posh
To Spalding and Chatteris and the shores of the Wash
I will follow that girl
And my heart I do pledge
We will grow old together
Picking seasonal veg
She's my girl from the Fens
She's my girl from the Fens
On her heart I depend
She's my girl from the Fens
She's my girl from the Fens
La la la, la la la, la la la la la la la...
Well she smells of onions
She's got hair like wheat
She's my potato-eyed girl
Sweet like sugar beet
And she keeps all my wishes in a pickling jar
Our love is bigger than a combine harvester
She's my girl from the Fens
She's my girl from the Fens
On her heart I depend
She's my girl from the Fens
She's my girl from the Fens
Where civilisation ends, that's the Fens
She's my girl from the Fens

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