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Humans are descended from ape-like ancestors
Thatâs a scientific fact, but some people still question it
Darwin does have detractors, religious detractors
Not scientific detractors, donât get the shit backwards
And when they question I listen, they say: âIf we came from
Monkeys, then how come thereâs monkeys still in existence?â
Well how about this: Iâm descended from Dutch immigrants
But I still have second cousins who live in the Netherlands
Theyâre not my ancestors; naw, theyâre my relatives
Since we have common genetic elements
Inherited from our great grandparents, things like freckles
And fair complexions and linguistic dexterousness
But if you got back far enough, humans are all relatives
And some of my relatives are religious fundamentalists
Approximately twenty percent of them
And at the dinner table we debate statistics â¦
Creationist cousins, theyâre my relations, I love âem
But when they talk about Jesus and Revelations and Judges
Iâve gotta take it up with them
âCause thereâs a better explanation for the place that we come from, okay?
Creationist cousins, theyâre my relations, I love âem
But at the dinner table we get on some crazy discussions
Iâm always questioning their basic assumptions
And saying, âyes I believe we came from monkeys, okay?â
So I say âCreationism is unscientific
Ninety nine percent of practicing scientists think evolution
Is the best explanation for living systems
Thereâs overwhelming empirical evidence!â
And they say âBaba, itâs not a scientific consensus
If a significant one percent is still dissenting
And risking black-listing in bold resistance
To this fascist conspiracy to promote secularism
And I say âGreat, they can challenge the system
If they can show us they have the evidence with themâ
And they âEvidence can be twisted
And your presuppositions are materialistic
Maybe the evidence scientists say theyâve collected
Just proves that God wants our faith to be tested!â
So I say âBut that means your benevolent God
Is the architect of a massive intellectual fraud!
So either evolution is the victim of a frame job
Which explains all of its predictive successes
Or we have to take God out of the scientific method
Otherwise he looks a bit deceptive⦠snap
Creationist cousins theyâre my relations I love âem
But when they talk about how fossils all came from the flood
I gotta take it up with them, âcause thereâs a better explanation
For the place that they come from, okay?
Creationist cousins theyâre my relations I love âem
âCause they gave me the patience to engage in discussions
With people who believe in stuff thatâs made up
Without calling them crazy or dunces, okay?
And thatâs when my sister steps in and says
âBaba, the Western scientific method
Is just as subjective as every other cultural tradition
Except itâs just better at pretending to be objective
All behaviour is socially-constructed
Gender roles have nothing to do with genitals
Theyâre just a way for men to control womenâs goals
And try to turn us all into Playboy centerfolds
Havenât you heard about that tribe in the Amazon
Where the woman does the manâs jobs and plants the crops
And brings home the food for the man to wash?
Um, I canât remember exactly what that clan is called
But I know itâs a published fact
Because I read about it in my Womenâs Studies class
And it proves that gender is a socially constructed act
So how does your theory explain that?â
And all I can do is come back with more statistics
About human sexual dimorphism
And male versus female reproductive investments
And, letâs just say, the discussions are endless
Creationist cousins theyâre my relations I love âem
My gender feminist sister and my shamanist brother
And my dad with his reiki practice and my naturopathic mother
But Iâm a rational fucker, okay?
Creationist cousins theyâre my relations I love âem
âCause they gave me the patience to engage in discussions
With people who believe in stuff thatâs blatantly made up
Without calling them crazy or dunces, okay?
So sometime I come across as a bit of an arsehole
But Iâm not impartial â itâs not about whoâs is impartial;
Itâs about how much evidence you can marshal
And how you deliver the parcel
And when my relatives argue, I have to have faith
That we can reach the genuine article in a rational way
Thatâs a different kind of faith than my cousins have
In divine creation, but hey, to all of my relatives
And fellow primates, I say
If it makes you feel better, go head and pray
In fact, hereâs how I pray in a secular way
I say, âI have creationist relatives and relative apes
And I wish them all happiness, whatever their faith
And I wish myself patience, since I relish debates
Let us all be respectful and still tell it straightâ
Okay? Okay?
- Álbum:
- Big Boy In Love
- The Canterbury Tales Remixed
- The Rap Guide to Evolution: Revised
- The Rap Guide to Business - EP
- The Rap Guide to Human Nature
- Rapconteur
- Apocalyptic Utopian Dreams In the Western Wilderness
- The Rap Guide to Evolution
- The Rap Canterbury Tales
- Lit Hop
- Swordplay
- The Rap Guide to Religion
- The Rap Guide to Medicine