So you think you're gaein tae the North
To spend a holiday
'Cause you're vaguely Scottish on your mither's siiide
And you've heard of ancient glories
Both reknowned in song and story
Kilts and haggis, Andy Stewart, and Roclyde
Ye go up by Crianlarich
It's the gateway to the North
And the scenery will please your eyes, I'm sure
Ye take oot your picnic basket
'Cause the car has blown a gasket
In the middle o' a place called Rannoch Moor
Na na naa nya na na na nana na na na
Nana na na na na na na na
(That's a little Scottish chorus.)
So you telephone the garage
Listed in the tourist guide
That was published for you by the RAC
But by design or by intention
Or they just forgot to mention
That the garage closes doon for half past three
So you're towed behind this tractor
Tae a corrugated shed
That's surrounded by farm implements and carts
And you scratch your head and wonder
Why you ever bought a Honda
'Cause they'll have to send to Tokyo for the parts
Na na naa nya na na na nana na na na
Nana na na na na na na na
So you board the train for Oban
And you get the boat to Mull
Feeling like you've had a night upon the tiles
Ye pay 20 pence for coffee
With a tang o' diesel oil
You're experiencing the Swindle o' the Isles
But your pulse begins to quicken
With the thoughts of berry pickin'
So you take a trip to Gowrie for a spell
Wi' some wellies o' your mither's
That she bought in Arlie Brothers
And a Gideon Bible pinched frae a hotel
Na na naa nya na na na nana na na na
Nana na na na na na na na
So you're standing picking rasps
Being stung to death by wasps
The midges and the clegs are making free
And the bairns have ate the berries
And contracted dysentery
'Cause last week they sprayed the crop wi' DDT
So you're heading back to Birmingham
More waterlogged than tanned
But no signs of habitation can you see
When you thought you were in Berwick
You were actually in Lerwick
'Cause some vandal changed the signpost in Dundee
Na na naa nya na na na nana na na na
Nana na na na na na na na

ENVIAR CORREÇÕES